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Scientists have finally discovered what's wrong with the female brain:
On the left side, there is nothing right, and on the right side, there is nothing left.
 
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Trimisa de cat pe 18 ianuarie 2007 10:44 | 2629 afisari
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Acesta este un e-mail intern (pentru angajatii romani) de la reprezentanta in Romania a unei mari corporatii (faza e pe bune!)
To: All Romanian Speaking Staff
Subject: Improper Language Usage
It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our office in Romania that offensive language is commonly used by our Romanian speaking staff. Such behavior, in addition to violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and staff. All personnel will immediately adhere to the following
rules:

1. Words like futui, dute-n pu** mea, pu** and other such expressions will not be tolerated or used for emphasis or dramatic effect, no matter how heated a discussion may become.

2. You will not say si-a bagat pu** when someone makes a mistake, or s-a cacat pe el if you see someone being reprehended, or baga-mi-as, when a major mistake has been made. All forms and derivations of the verb a se caca and a se fute are utterly inappropriate and unacceptable in our environment.

3. No project manager, section head or administrator under any circumstances will be referred to as pu** de om, cacanaru' or boul.

4. Lack of determination will not be referred to as pulalau nor will persons who lack initiative be referred to as muiangiu.

5. Unusual or creative ideas offered by management are not to be referred to as porcarii.

6. Do not say fu**-ti mata if somebody is persistent; do not add pu** mea, if a colleague is going through a difficult situation.
Furthermore, you must not say am pus-o (refer to item 2) nor o sa ne-o traga when a matter becomes excessively complicated.

7. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say du-te-n pu** mea or should you ever substitute "May I help you?" with, ce pu** mea vrei?.

8. Under no circumstances should you ever call your elderly industrial partners bosorogi imputiti.

9. Do not say ia mai mereti-n pu** cu cacatu' asta when a relevant project is presented to you, nor should you ever answer fu**-te-n cu* when your assistance is required.

10. You should never call partner representatives as boul dracului or tampitu' ala.

11. The sexual behavior of our staff is not to be discussed in terms such as pizdulica buna, futaciosu' or homalau' lu' peste.

12. Last but not least, after reading this note, please do not say ma sterg la c** cu textul asta. Just keep it clean and dispose of it properly.
 
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Trimisa de dan pe 11 decembrie 2006 15:05 | 4775 afisari
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I LOVE YOU DOMNISOARA
SI SUNT VERRY MAHNIT
CACI WHEN I SPEAK ENGLEZA
YOU RAZI NECONTENIT.
 
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Trimisa de NICOLE pe 29 noiembrie 2006 16:34 | 3475 afisari
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A wife asked her husband:
- What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?
He looked at her from head to toe and replied,
- I like your sense of humor.
 
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Trimisa de sorin pe 13 octombrie 2006 11:57 | 2529 afisari
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