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- What's the difference between white fairy tales and black fairy tales?
- A white fairy tales starts with "Once upon a time......", a black fairy tale starts with "Yo, yo, motherfuckers, ain't gonna believe this shit......" .
 
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Trimisa de pe 22 ianuarie 2011 12:23 | 1316 afisari
 

A man wakes-up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says,
'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.
Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a multi-car accident…
You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, but… something happened.
I'm trying to break this gently, but the fact is, your penis was chopped off and we have been unable to find it.' :(
The man groans, but the doctor goes on,
'You've got $9000 in insurance compensation coming.
We have the technology to build you a new penis that will work as well as your old one did – better, in fact!
But, it doesn't come cheap: It's $1000 an inch.'
The man perks-up at this.
'So,' the doctor says, 'it's for you to decide how many inches you want…
But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife.
I mean, if you had a five-inch one before, and you decide to go for a nine-incher, she might not like the extra stress.
But if you had a nine-inch one before, and you decide only to invest in a five-incher, she might be disappointed.
So it's important that she plays a role in the decision.'
The man agrees to talk with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day.
'So,' says the doctor, 'have you spoken with your wife?'
'I have,' says the man.
'And has she helped you in making the decision?'
'Yes, she has,' says the man.
'And what is it?' asks the doctor.
'We're remodeling the kitchen.'
 
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Trimisa de pe 02 iulie 2009 14:48 | 1717 afisari
 

Kiwi walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says:
"Darling, this is the hog I have sex with when you have a headache."

His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll
find that's a sheep, you idiot."

The man says: "I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."
 
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Trimisa de Codryna pe 09 iunie 2009 19:44 | 2087 afisari
 

A man wakes-up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says,
'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.
Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a multi-car accident…
You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, but… something happened.
I'm trying to break this gently, but the fact is, your penis was chopped off and we have been unable to find it.' :(
The man groans, but the doctor goes on,
'You've got $9000 in insurance compensation coming.
We have the technology to build you a new penis that will work as well as your old one did – better, in fact!
But, it doesn't come cheap: It's $1000 an inch.'
The man perks-up at this.
'So,' the doctor says, 'it's for you to decide how many inches you want…
But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife.
I mean, if you had a five-inch one before, and you decide to go for a nine-incher, she might not like the extra stress.
But if you had a nine-inch one before, and you decide only to invest in a five-incher, she might be disappointed.
So it's important that she plays a role in the decision.'
The man agrees to talk with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day.
'So,' says the doctor, 'have you spoken with your wife?'
'I have,' says the man.
'And has she helped you in making the decision?'
'Yes, she has,' says the man.
'And what is it?' asks the doctor.
'We're remodeling the kitchen.'
 
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Trimisa de Keops pe 21 aprilie 2009 12:05 | 1348 afisari
 

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